How much is TOO much?

I recently came across a television show, you know the ratchet morning ones. On the show was a couple discussing how they were going to get through their problems. During the segment where they discussed passed issues, the woman brought up old infidelity issues which was followed by her husband actually admitting to cheating. Some of you may feel like cheating isn’t the worst thing to do in a marriage “every man does it” right? Well to make matters worse her husband gave her a STD while she was pregnant almost causing their baby to be born blind! To make matters even worse he gave her another STD during a different pregnancy! Stories like this always make me think to myself “what the hell would make someone stay with a partner like this?” better yet, what is it within you that allows yourself to get over an incident so extreme so that you can continue on in the relationship ? How much is too far? I’m young and also don’t share children with someone but I couldn’t imagine getting past something like this.

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You know there are a lot of women probably a majority that take a shit load of disrespect from one guy or another. I know women, and I mean Quality Women who have stayed with their guy after being cheated on with their own friends or family member. I know women who have let their boyfriends beat them up when they get upset…is this the norm? So just because you might’ve pissed him off a slap and punch here and there is acceptable? If so how many passes does he get? Does it depend on how what YOU did that gives HIM the right to slap you up? Does this show that he cares about you? Do you answer these questions the same if your boyfriend has a lot of money or taking care of you? For most women, although they won’t admit social status and money does determine how much bullshit they take from a man, And let’s not be biased if you answered most of those questions no and you wouldn’t take none of this, is okay for you to react to your man in this way? Let’s switch gender roles for a minute, if your man, husband or baby father cheats with a girl you don’t like, is it ok for you to shred clothes, burn sneakers, break games, buss windows and slash tires ?

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Here’s something I think about often #thoughtwithEllekay. The idea of relationships not between man & woman but between love & love is shifting. So we are accepting more, especially women. For instance when Chris Brown put Karrueche on blast for having threesomes I was like “oh my god” but it wasn’t a surprise because most women in her position would have done the same thing. It make me wonder if he wasn’t Chris Brown would she still be down for that. It’s funny because she did all that just to get cheated on by a chick that’s not even in her caliber (that’s men for ya!). It’s haunting to think that women as pretty and kind as Karrueche lower their relationship standards every day. It’s like society says you have to go above and beyond to keep your man. What’s so crazy is the women stay half the time because they don’t want feel like they lost their man, they are actually too embarrassed to let people know “hey he fucked me over so I left him” and they actually stay !! Even Hillary Clinton did this.

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I’m not sure what’s happening but men have to step it up. I think this starts with us though ladies, as a whole. I don’t have all the answers but I’m thinking we can start with leaving guys behind on the first strike instead of giving them a million chances and 20 years to MAN THE FUCK up. Another suggestion would be saving some things for marriage ever heard the saying “why buy the cow if you’re getting the milk for free?” this suggest that women save some things like threesomes for a man that deserves it, and if you do decide to go the extra mile for your guy in whatever way,  do it for you and not him.

 

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